The Egyptian Cinderella- Year 3 writing

Here are some extracts from the amazing stories some of the children in 3W have created…

The lovely master walked over to Rhodapis as she sat admiring the scenery on the riverbank. He gave Rhodapis a bracelet which was so delicate and precious. As Rhodps put the bracelet on her arm it sparkled and shone in the sun. the bracelet had magical gems coloured like a rainbow. As rhodapis sat admiring her bracelet from the master she felt the gentle stares and loud giggles from the slave girls appearing from tree. The slave girls was very jelous and stood sniggering at Rhodapis as they laughed they told her to get back to her chores right away.

As rhodapis walked away across the river bank, she gently looked back and seen the girls getting on the barge, they laughed and shouted “we will enjoy the party” – Rhodapis became upset and was trying her hardest to hold back the tears. She was devasted she couldn’t go to the party.

Rhodapis arrived back and started doing her chores she was devasted she couldn’t go to the party and meet the Pharoah.she thought I cant do this anymore and went back to the riverbank to finish her art work.

As she sat there drawing the beautiful flowers that waved in the breeze, a slithery snake in the shadow of the grass appeared sniffing and slithering towards Rhodapis and snatched her beautiful shining bracelet from her arm and slittered away quickly. Rhodapis jumped up from the grass and shouted “come back please come back – my beautiful shining bracelet” – her eyes filled with tears and she bent towards the floor and burst out sobbing. As she lifted her head she seen the snake in the far distance travelling along the grass in the direction the other slaves girls travelled towards the party.

Harri J

Angelica sank down beside the river and felt very gloomy. Tears filled her eyes when she thought of the exciting times the servant girls would be enjoying at the ball.  she took off her magnificent headdress and put it on the ground beside her.  Angelica started to feel better when she saw the sunlight make the jewels on her headdress sparkle and shine, the reflections shone on the water.  As Angelica paddled her dainty feet in the river she noticed  a flock of magpies had appeared and began flying around.  Angelica was fascinated by the way they swarmed in circles when suddenly one of the magpies swooped down and grabbed her precious headdress.  Angelica shouted with fear to the magpie to stop and go away.  She flapped her arms and tried to distract the bird so it would drop her headdress but it didn’t work.


Angelica was devastated, she could never replace the beautiful headdress and she desperately looked  to see where the magpies had gone and  tried to follow them along the river bank hoping the bird would lose its grip and drop her precious belongings.  The magpie soared higher and higher and soon all Angelica could see was the sparkle of the beautiful gems glinting in the sunlight as the magpies disappeared from sight.


Angelica was distraught, she had never owned anything so stunning and now it was gone.


Whilst Angelica was heartbroken about losing her precious headdress the magpie had flown straight towards the sound of the ball.  The magpie could see so many shining and sparkling jewels it was spoilt for choice.  It dropped the head dress straight into the lap of Prince Alfredo who jumped up with astonishment.

Alfie L

Once upon a time in the beautiful land of Egypt there lived a talented girl called Rhodahpis.When she was a little girl she was sadly stolen by agressive pirates from her home in Greece, and sold as a slave in Egypt. Egypt was an extremely hot country and had lots of dry, rocky desert. The raging, bright sun shone all over Egypt and its nation, it gave the dessert a golden, brown glow and made the river and sea glisten like diamonds. The river Nile gently flowed throughout Egypt, people lived next to it for water ,to grow their green crops and they also used it for travel. By the time Rhodahpis settled into Egypt some girls came into her life, they were servent girls too.They loved mocking her because she was different for example they said haha look at her with lots of chores to do they did this because her eyes were as blue as the Nile and theirs were as brown as chocolate, her hair was golden and got tangles in the breeze and theirs were as dark as panthers and hung straight down, her skin burned red in the hot sun of Egypt and theirs glowed copper.When everyone was asleep and Rhodahpis was alone dancing to her tiny, red snake and the singing birds she would start to smile and she felt like she owned the world.

Jessica P


As that evening approached when Rhodopis had finished her chores she went down to the forest with her animal friends. She danced and sang the night away, but what she didn’t realise is her master was approaching. “ What a beautiful song” gasps the master. “ For this deserves a reward,” the master said. The following day as Rhodopis awoke, there she saw a pristine tiara with beautiful glistening gems lying beside her pillow. The other servant girl got site of this and was not happy, as they had never been given a gift before. “ Why would the master give it to her, she’s just a ugly slave” one the the servant girls grunted. With that the servant girls made sure Rhodopis was too busy to sing and dance again.


The next morning Kipa announced, “ Today we will travel to Memphis, where the Pharaoh is to hold a ball with a feast like no other.” “ There will be dancing and singing,” one of the servant girls responded. Just as Rhodopis was about to smile, Kipa said “ sorry Rhodopis but you’re not invited, someone has to stay behind to do the chores.” as tears built up in her eyes, the servant girls rush off to get ready.

Ela B

Out of nowhere a huge shadow appeared over Rhodopis head she glanced up to see a magnificent eagle gliding above her it was such a beautiful sight but suddenly the eagle swooped down that fast Rhodipis felt the breeze off its wings sweep across her face and to her horror she seen its giant claws in front of her she closed her eyes out of fear. unbeknown to Rhodopis her exquisite shawl had slipped off her shoulders and as she looked up to her dismay the eagle had grasped it between its claws and was flying off down the Nile, her heart sunk and all she could do was watch as the eagle flew further away she was devastated.


The eagle flew along the Nile all the way to Memphis where the pharaoh was holding his banquet. Amasis was just about to address his guests when suddenly the eagle dropped the beautiful shawl and it landed on his knee.” What a beautiful garment, this must be a sign sent from the gods” proclaimed Amasis I will marry the fair maiden that this belongs too.  Amasis summoned his guards and told them to dismiss his guests he was to start his quest to find his bride immediately.


The Pharaoh set off on his journey on his quest to find his queen.  He trudged across the sweltering hot desserts where the imposing pyramids towered over the golden sea of sand and hiked the steep cliffs to search near the eagles nests.

Girls and women rich and poor would swarm the Pharaoh wherever he ventured but none did the shawl that he had clutched in his hand seem to fit or look quite right. The more he searched the more determined the Pharaoh became in his pursuit. He summoned the royal barge and pledged he would travel to every city along The Nile. The roaring of the trumpet alerted the people he had arrived. But sadly he still hasn’t tracked down his queen.    


Finley R



Willies diary entry by Harry 6T

The train journey was long and tiring. I sat there weeping, wondering where I’m going to end up. I’ve just arrived at a place which looks so different from the dangerous, busy, loud and hazardous city I lived in. I’ve come here to be safe from the cruelty of the war, in which I stood waiting anxiously to be placed in a new home. I felt so vulnerable and alone before I was introduced to Mr Oakley. A towering beast who looked grumpy and whose voice was like thunder. The cottage was dull with not a lot of light. I sat there reluctant and apprehensive, I was struggling to take it all in, until I saw him pick up the poker. I was terrified he may be giving me a beating, just like my ma did to me all the time, but all he was doing was stoking the fire. Mr Tom showed me where I will be sleeping, but suddenly I spotted a bed and I remember my mother saying beds are for dead people. It is all very strange. I rubbed my eyes cautiously knowing I would have this room to myself, I was feeling so sick and panicky.


I was perched on the end of the wooden stool anxiously watching Mr Tom and his movements. He placed a plate down in front of me with food on, I had never seen this kind of food before. This food was different to the food my ma fed me back at home. It smelt delicious and it looked mouth-wateringly nice but then the worst happened and it got stuck in my throat. I felt myself begin to panic, I felt embarrassed and I was scared what Mr Tom was going to do. I heard my ma’s voice in my head, repeatedly telling me “you must be good”. There was a moment of silence, followed by Mr Tom making a joke and that made me realise Mr Tom is kind and caring. As time ticked on, I began to feel more relieved, relaxed and safe about my placing with Mr Tom. Maybe now this may start to feel like my new home?

By Harry 6T

Willie’s Dairy Entry by Daisy

Dear Dairy,

Today has been a day with lots of mixed feelings. I got evacuated. I had a few tears welling up in my eyes. That was only because I didn’t want to say goodbye to London. I hated my mother. She only liked me when I was good. She was so cruel. I have been evacuated to a town called Little Weirwold. I was evacuated on this metal thingy which the person next to me told me it was a train. Then when I arrived at the home where I would be staying the lady rang the doorbell. Then this tall gruff man was staring right down at me. I was a bit frightened really then the lady spoke to the man I think she said this is Willie he’s going to stay with you for a while or something like that.When I came in he took my coat and hung it on the coat stand thingy I don’t know its name.He is not the nicest person I’ve ever met but he’s ok. It’s a bit of a relief that I moved in with Mr Thomas Oakley. I thought I wouldn’t have someone to live with. I thought I wouldn’t have anybody and then end up in a children’s Home so I am very lucky really.


Mr Tom is a very kind man, nicer than my mother, I think she was very mean and did it her way all the time which isn’t fair. In Mr Tom’s house I got my own room which is nice, he had a dog called Sammy. I think he likes me. Mr Tom hasn’t hurt me once, which is good. His house is quite small but that doesn’t bother me. Anyway, I am just in bed. It isn’t that comfy but I’m ok with that as long as I have a bed I don’t mind. I bet some children don’t even have a bed to sleep on which is unfortunate. Now I am safe and sound in my new home but the question is will this be my home forever…



William Beech diary entry

Dear Diary

My name is William, William Beech. I have been taken from London to the country because of the Blitz.  The country is very different to London -there aren’t many roads or big tall buildings.  I’ve been set with this very nice man. His name is Mr Tom. He is that nice he let me have a room to myself! Anyways, I like it here. I also live near a church. I saw a cow for the first time… anyway I think I’m going to like it here. I have a nice house and a nice man to live with.


Written by Connor. M

Willie’s Diary Entry

Dear Diary,  

                                                                                                                      November 16 1939                                                 


I woke up at 6:07 in the morning. I was in a terrible shock this morning,

I never shivered that bad before. Twenty minutes after I got up WW2 had started.  I accidentally wet myself cause of the sirens, I went pale and threw up on the brown wooden floor . So Mr Tom grabbed me and ran up stairs to the toilet then I  threw  up even more. Then when I calmed down, we both went sprinting down the stairs,  and put black paper on the windows, so no one will bomb our house.

Later there were planes flying over us and it was the Germans, they were loaded with bombs. A couple of hours later we were listening to next door screaming crying then a massive bang came from next door and it wasn’t just one bang it was 3 bangs and 3 is plenty 

 BANG! BANG! BANG! It went. You can be very very lucky to be alive and this is definitely the worst day of my life. Even known that my Mum did hit me I still hope she is ok. My Dad passed away last year. Now there is WW 2 so my Mum could die now and I do not want that I would be gutted.  



Diary entry of Willie the evacuee


Dear Diary,

I can’t believe that I have left London, mother said it would be best if I went somewhere safe. It’s  not that boring to be honest. Mister Tom, the man who is looking after me, is huge and towers over me. He is  kinda nice, he showed me my room. Mother said only dead people sleep in beds but I managed a whole night in a bed. Yesterday, we went shopping. It was quite fun. I got a comic book and a strawberry lollipop, it was nice. In the evening he read me a book before I went to sleep. Mister Tom has a dog (Who is called Sammy, he is really cute). Mother told me to be a good boy for mister Tom, I think I am being quite good for Tom, well I think. I also went to a library, it was so peaceful. All the books are so different and educational. It’s always peaceful at Mister Toms’ house, he reads to me in bed. But when we go out, we have to carry gas masks which is annoying. But war was declared so we have to wear the gas masks or else. I have to help Tom its actually not that bad to be honest.

Well life here isn’t bad, for now. 

Kadie-Leigh 6MP

William Beech’s Diary

13th september 1940

Dear Diary

today has been the best day of my short(ish) life , war arose so i’m now an evac .

I just met Mr Tom and he scares me but also inspires me to be strong just like him.


The bed terrified me but Mr Tom assured me It’s not for dead since my mother told me it was

I was petrified when Mr Tom used a poker in the fire since i knew i hadn’t gone to school but it would hurt more than a belt and ended up fainting

I eventually felt happier and safer in Little Weirworld because I escaped the clutches of my evil mother

Your friend , William

William Beech Diary Entry By Hollie 6T


Thursday 13th September 1939


Dear Diary,


Last Thursday was the worst day ever. I found out that war has been declared and that  I had  to be evacuated. I was really scared, I thought to myself  it could a really mean person or it could be a really nice person, well today you will find out…


When Tom (the man) was standing at the cottage door I was absolutely terrified. He looked as if he would batter me even if I was being good. I was also a bit embarrassed because I was the last evacuee off the train and also the last one to be chosen. But I followed him into the  old cottage anyway.


When Mr Tom was stoking the fire with the poker I was petrified, why did he even have it anyway I thought. I was overwhelmed. I couldn’t  stop thinking about if he was going to hurt me if I was bad and the poker, was he going to slap me with it or not. I started panicking, I had too much in my mind…I fainted.

But in the end I found out actually he is a really nice person, and I am grateful to be with him and relieved I am not with my awful mother.


William Beech xx


Diary entry 1

Dear Diary,                                                                      13th september 1939


Today has been the worst day of my life. Neville Chamberlain has just declared world war 2 across the world moreover my mother has just told me i will have to be evacuated to the countryside. I’m so sad  I will be leaving my mother. At least it’s for the best, London has become so toxic and dangerous for me to stay there. My mother sent me on this train thingi was so scared at first but when I got or I was terrified. 


I was standing at my new carer’s massive door. Petrified, I nearly peed my pants(whilst waiting  for him or her to answer the door.) Suddenly, I saw the door open. I started to panic until I saw the old, kind man standing there. He offered me to come in. I slowly started to walk into the fantastic, amazing house. I was so petrified my hair was sticking up.


He showed me to this majestic bedroom. I was confused at first until Mr Tom who was my carer  told me this was my new room. I was so happy, and excited. Suddenly, I started to remember  that my mother is probably going through hell but still I’m so excited about Mr Tom he seems so kind and helpful.


Me and Mr Tom went down stairs and sat next to the fire. I loved the boiling hot fire it’s so warm and it made me feel so calm until Mr Tom pulled out a razor sharp stick thing. I was  so worried that he would hit me with it. I started to have dashavoo that my mother was hitting me. Suddenly I got so terrified and fainted. When I woke  up i realised he didn’t hit me with it . i was surprised. 


I started to trust Mr Tom and loved him he cared for me lots he is just like a father figure to me.I still worry about my mother though who wouldn’t.  Lily-Ann 6T